I’m introspective, always in my own head. Recently, I’ve had to ask myself and pray about this: Am I all about me, myself, and I? Am I too much in my head and not enough about others? As I pondered on this, I realized that what I write and talk to groups about most are outcomes of these introspections. I teach based on what God has taught me about me and my relationship with Him and others. Ultimately, these introspections are from Him, for His use to ultimately flow to others. Having come to that understanding, I realize I just need to go with it, be who I am, and allow God to use my in-my-headness for His purpose.
Since I’m my own worst critic, it is in my nature to turn His gift (my introspective way of processing life) into something selfish, negative, or sinful. Because I’m crazy, self-defeating me, I assume that something that comes naturally for me can’t be right. I’m not sure why this revelation has come during this season, but it’s as if God has opened my eyes to His plan for my over-active, over-thinking mind. I love that He loves me exactly as I am – even though He still has plans to continue my sanctification and growth with Him. I need to learn this lesson and carry it forward, not just “get it” for the moment. It’s okay to be who I am. I was His idea.
So for you, have you looked within to see how you’re distinctly shaped and what your specific gifts are? Do you belittle your gifts as if they are “lesser” than others who seem to be exceptionally gifted? This may be something to ponder on and work through with your Creator, who intended you to be the uniquely you that you are.
Joy and Peace,